Exhaustion

I've finally cracked!! I just had what I believe was a mini mental breakdown. Woo hoo! Isn't it great to be me?? Shit, shit, shit, shit! I hate making commitments that I can't keep and lately that's been happening alot for me! I said I'd go to the Short Film Festival tonight but low and behold I'm not. And why?? Because I'm so tired! I just can't cope with things anymore. There's so much pressure on homework, school, teachers and friends and I just can't do it anymore!!! And it's not like everyone around me is putting that pressure on me. No, I'm putting it on myself!!! I come home every night and do homework, I help my friends with the requests they make, which I do not mind doing, but I have so much on my plate that I haven't been able to fulfil them!!! There's just so much pressure in my life at the moment that I don't know how to relax!!

So I'm taking the night off. I have not done any homework and even though I feel guilty about it, I'm not going to. I'm not going to the film festival (despite Isabelle's bloody pestering - seriously can't that girl just leave me along and not feel the need to know every single detail of my life??) which annoys me but I have to find a way to relax. Mum just came in and checked to see if I was ok. Seriously, she's my rock. I don't know what I'd do without her. Actually I probably would have given up long ago. Nevermind just 2 more days, just 2 more days, just 2 more days! I will be ok, I will be ok, I will be ok. I hope...

Supanova!!!

Yay I went to Supanova!!!! It was excellent and I had the best time there. But wait! I hear you say: "Oh great one!! What is Supanova???"

Well my young Padawan's I shall tell you. Basically Supanova is a Pop Culture Expo which involves Sci-Fi, Fantasy, Music and of course Anime & Manga!!!! This of course may sound geeky, but hey! That's me!

I went with my primary school friend and we basically shopped till we dropped!! I got 2 DVD for $10! A plushie of my all time fave character!! Some One Piece badges, One Piece and Avatar stickers, a Bleach poster book and I'm pretty sure there's more! ^__^ Oh and I saw Julian and Cameron there. That was cool but I'm pretty sure they were freaked out but the amount of bags I was carrying! ;)

But sadly we all must come back to earth at some stage so now I am reminded of all the homework I have to do. I have an English SAC tomorrow, a Maths SAC on Tuesday, Business Management notes to type up and a Psychology book to read. Thankfully I finished Triage which amazingly I did not mind.

I hate Maths!!

That's it! I'm at the final bloody straw. I cannot take maths methods anymore!!! I've tried and tried and tried and even with my tutors help I just can't do the damn equations!! I know, it seems like I'm giving up, but what do you do when you've reached the end of the road???? You can keep pushing and pushing and pushing until you've worn yourself out and gotten no where or you and try a different route. One that is a little easier and your pushing actually pays off. So I've made up my mind! I'm going to change into general maths ASAP!!! It's going to be hard to convince my dad that I want to change though. He's always been a maths person and more than anything wants me to be one as well. I'm sorry dad but I can't be that person. You did the sciences and I do the arts. That is just the way it is...

Sleepy... Oh so Sleepy...

I'm really tired. Other than the pressures of school, chores, homework and SAC's I get a cold!! Yeah just excellent huh? Just what I needed... NOT!!!! I'm feeling a little better though and I'm really greatful that I had a short day today. Now if only I can survive the rest of the week...

But these should keep me going. A friend of my mum's sent these vid's to us and I have to say that these guys are amazing!! Again Chak De India!!!



And now them in the final!!

Bluuuuhd!

So I realise that last blog post was a little on the depressing side. But now I am on top of the world! Well not really but I like to think I am from time to time. Nothing much to say at the moment except that I am doing a challange one of my friend's created for me. She said that I had to create my favourite characters from my favourite show One Piece for the game The Sims 2. That might seem easy but you have to find the right meshes, recolour them to the best of your abilities and then try and creat any meshes that could not be found. All I can say is thank god for Photoshop.

And now for some fun. I promised a friend that I would post this up on my blog so here you go!

Indirect Vs. Direct

Don't you just hate it when you get a really pathetic score on a test or exam of some sort and then everyone around you goes: "Oh but that's really good!" I do and that's exactly what happened to me a couple of days ago. I mean I love how some friends can be very supportive nand thats what they are but sometimes I just feel like saying "Shut up, it's a pathetic score and you know it."

I guess I am grateful to my Dad for being very direct then. I tell him and he says "Ouch, that's a horrible score," well I know I wanted people to be direct but really then I broke down. I feel better now. I know what he was trying to say and after he got over the shock in seeing me in such a state (yeah it was that bad) he told me "Just as long as you learn from your mistakes you're fine." and I think that's a fair enough statement.

Now moving on to a lighter note, I have to say this video really inspired me. It's great for people of our generation:

Yo ho. Yo ho. A Pirates Life for Me

I would kill to be a pirate. To have all that freedom to be able to do whatever you wish. Of course there are responsibilities that come with it, like making sure you have the right amount of supplies to survive, but still I reckon I'd make a pretty good pirate. Or maybe I've just been living in my fantasy world again. Sometime I wish I could just escape reality, just live in another world, maybe one where I'd fit in. Today my dad asked me why don't I choose subjects like Economics or Accounting or Physics, Chemistry or Biology. Well why don't I?? It's because they aren't my strong point. I mean I have a pretty supportive dad overall. It's just sometimes he doesn't realise that I love art and that's my passion. Science isn't and neither is maths. I wonder if he'll ever learn that.

On a positive not, it is one of my favourite character's birthday today. I know you're thinking "She's a freak!!!" Maybe so, but we all need a little something that we can celebrate once in a while. So I was happy on how this day turned out, despite the little trival things that I refuse to let it get me down. Of course I still think if I were a pirate life would be easier... but hey, that's just me!